Anthem of a Lost Soul
Xikay - Anthem of a Lost Soul
Look,
I know this may be a controversial topic
But someone has to tackle it
I wake up every morning and I'm pissed off
"Why?"
Cause every night I go to sleep wishing I'd never wake up
"Shit, but why?"
It's this depression that got me in lock, I'm trying to struggle but I can't get out. It's grip is getting tighter, my head's about to pop
"Fuck, man. I never knew."
Yeah, I know. Cause all you ever think about is you.
"Nah, man. That's not true."
Yeah, but it is, you see? And this is my life, even if it's hard for you to believe. There's no rolling of the dice. Life's a snake and I'm just the mouse.
"But… I care. I do. I've always wished the best for you. Even if I couldn't give it to you."
I wish I could believe, but reality tells other things to me.
"But."
No, just hear me out. When life starts shitting me out, no one's around. And I have to get back off the ground, forgotten how to walk, captivated by the sound of my heart hitting the ground.
"But it's just in your head. You see? I'm right here."
For now, and the next moment you're gone. But depression won't leave me alone.
"You can't expect me to stay with you 24/7."
No. But remember when I was eleven? And I told you that all that was in my head, was me: wishing me dead. Twenty years later and it's still the same. Now, I may sound selfish when I call your name. But I'm not just asking anyone for a save.
"How can I when you never tell. All the secrets you keep, the fake smiles you give away, giving people the idea that you're all okay."
Of course, how could I not? When I show my mental state my friends are the first ones out. You can't accept someone with a frown, but expect me to let my smile down?
"That's not what I meant."
Then maybe you should've watched what you said, when talking to someone with a dark clouded head, but you'll be mad at me instead, for the truths I said.
"You think you've got everyone figured out and no one's your friend. Because when you face your troubles, there's no back to lean against. But can I just say that you seem to forget, everyone else has their own problems in their head."
You don't need to remind me, cause I was there. When your girlfriend left, I was there. When your world broke apart and your reputation was left in the dark, I stepped up and let you inside. Yet, here I am. Nowhere to turn. Begging a friend to help me stay safe. And you're just about to slam the door in my face cause you got yo' own problems to face.
